The Politics of Appearance

There's no doubt that there is power in appearance. Attractive and fit people get hired faster, get free-be's more frequently, and are treated better by strangers. News anchors are attractive and thin (well at least the female anchors). I can't pretend that I've never used my subtle smile or soft eyes to get a favor or an extra hot fry from my favorite fast food restaurant.

As parents attempt to help their children get ahead in life, we are used to hearing about pushing children to be smart, hard-working, and well-rounded ---- but what about pretty?? And what does pretty mean anyway?

My freshman year at Northwestern I wrote a paper about how the politics of appearance have played a role in making black women with darker skin or thicker, course hair not consider themselves beautiful. This idea of becoming more "western" or European, has been adopted globally as part of this fast-paced, information age. And it scares me half to death.

Don't get me wrong, there's no problem in staying fit and always presenting a well-kept and neat you, but the idea of westernized beauty has gone way too far. I was shocked when I listened to the Today Show this week and heard about teens getting plastic surgery to increase self-esteem and prevent bullying. I was baffled: self-esteem is something that comes from inside. No matter what you change, there's always SOMETHING that someone can pick on you for. You have to be comfortable with you. Parents must help develop positive self-esteem (it starts with parents accepting and loving the person they are themselves).

This morning, I read an article about a 12 year-old Korean girl whose mother is mandating that she get plastic surgery to make her eyes wider. 

"I'm excited. I think I'll look better than I do now," she says shyly, breaking into a small smile.
Her mother, Jang Hyu-hee, says her daughter didn't ask for the surgery.

"I'm having her do it," says Jang, "because I think it'll help her. This is a society where you have to be pretty to get ahead. She's my only daughter."

The definition of pretty, explains their plastic surgeon, is not the standard Asian face, but closer to a Caucasian face. Dr Kim Byung-gun is the head of Seoul, South Korea's biggest plastic surgery clinic, BK DongYang. The clinic is a dozen stories tall, with all of its operating rooms full on the day of Min kyong's surgery.

To read more: http://www.cnn.com/2011/WORLD/asiapcf/05/19/korea.beauty/index.html?iref=storysearch

Rather than go into a rant about how rediculous this sounds to me ... I'll try to keep it simple. Love yourself. God doesn't make any mistakes. He numbered the hairs on your head, and He carefully molded you while you were in your mother's womb. Pretty has several definitions. Not just one. And yes, although I am a contestant in a beauty pageant, I have struggled with this issue as well. My solution: I embrace the person God made me. To be ashamed of something that He created is like slapping Him in the face. I know that I really am beautiful as he has made me -- chunky thighs, super thick fro, sweaty armpits, short toes, veiny arms, and all. I've learned to tame my poofy hair and dress ready to take a picture, but I am not nor will I ever be ashamed of who I am naturally.

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."
-Psalm 139:14 (NIV)

My favorite book of all time: http://www.amazon.com/Designed-Must-Special-American-Version/dp/0961527943  - My mom used to read this to me when I was little. No wonder self-confidence is a part of my platform! :-)